As I sit here waiting to see whether my new tires will work on the truck, I have changed the channel in the showroom just in time to see a demonstration of what sugar does to increase belly fat. Since I don't believe in coincidences, I am compelled to watch.
The advertisement that followed quickly said, just eat right, jog when you can, and keep your eye on the prize. I think I'll try that!
Today my thoughts have surrounded around shifting my thoughts from "I deserve that milkshake" to "I deserve that healthier life." Who's with me??
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone
Thursday, October 30, 2014
Tuesday, October 28, 2014
All over the place!! (at least it's written that way) :-)
So I promise that the newness of this blog will wear off, but for now I am finding healing in typing out my issues. So tonight we went to Tex and Shirley's for dinner cause the girls were headed to scouts, and it made sense as a mid point for both of us. I had the breakfast combo, which includes eggs, bacon, sausage, hash browns, and pancakes.
Through the day at school I had a mini bagel with cream cheese, a banana for snack, and steamed veggies for lunch. In full disclosure, I smelled the chick-fil-a which is served on Tuesdays, and it sucked me right in for an 8-count nugget. (totally not planned)
I seem to go through waves of certainty that I have this under control, and then I will hit a wall of "I deserve to eat what I want," like I have earned any of it. The mental part is the hardest for sure.
Siri defines willpower as "the trait of resolutely controlling your own behavior." Yeah, I suck at this. It really is two-fold because pre-meal I feel so drawn to the food that I can block out the idea of willpower, but then post meal I feel that next time I will certainly have the willpower to avoid. This I attribute to the fact that I am full, and therefore have received what I wanted in the first place.
I am working on balancing out what I am eating throughout the day so that by the time dinner rolls around, I am not ravenous!
I mean today I decided that because I did not have a parent to watch my class during lunch, I deserved that pack of nuggets! Haha! I actually said this to myself in my head. I had time to run to the office to heat my broccoli and carrots that I packed, but not the chicken that I had in my mini fridge already at school. Crazy...
I am trying not to count mistakes, but rather victories. I am at the same time trying to be real with myself and not make excuses. This is what has gotten me to this far removed from that 199lb goal that I still have not hit.
Tomorrow is a new day... Thanks for reading!
Through the day at school I had a mini bagel with cream cheese, a banana for snack, and steamed veggies for lunch. In full disclosure, I smelled the chick-fil-a which is served on Tuesdays, and it sucked me right in for an 8-count nugget. (totally not planned)
I seem to go through waves of certainty that I have this under control, and then I will hit a wall of "I deserve to eat what I want," like I have earned any of it. The mental part is the hardest for sure.
Siri defines willpower as "the trait of resolutely controlling your own behavior." Yeah, I suck at this. It really is two-fold because pre-meal I feel so drawn to the food that I can block out the idea of willpower, but then post meal I feel that next time I will certainly have the willpower to avoid. This I attribute to the fact that I am full, and therefore have received what I wanted in the first place.
I am working on balancing out what I am eating throughout the day so that by the time dinner rolls around, I am not ravenous!
I mean today I decided that because I did not have a parent to watch my class during lunch, I deserved that pack of nuggets! Haha! I actually said this to myself in my head. I had time to run to the office to heat my broccoli and carrots that I packed, but not the chicken that I had in my mini fridge already at school. Crazy...
I am trying not to count mistakes, but rather victories. I am at the same time trying to be real with myself and not make excuses. This is what has gotten me to this far removed from that 199lb goal that I still have not hit.
Tomorrow is a new day... Thanks for reading!
Monday, October 27, 2014
And today...
First of all, thanks so much to those who have offered comments and likes! I certainly appreciate the fact that peeps will take the time to read what I have to say.
Let's get to it...
I had training today, and weighed in at the end. 208.5lbs. This is a increase from Friday's weigh in by about 2.5lbs, due to my choice of Panda Express (them crispy honey shrimp are bangin!) on Friday, Jason's Deli (who doesn't eat the FREE corn and spice muffins) Saturday after going to Apple for the 100th time only to find out that the newly released iPhone 6 Plus that they advertise every 6 minutes on national TV is still out of stock at the store that created the stupid thing. Then finally, Sunday's traditional dinner at Moe's following the worship service that we lead on Sunday evenings at 6:30pm, which everyone should go to... SHOUT! at First Lutheran Church Here is a sample of what you can hear when you come!
Anyway, today was much better from the food standpoint. I did eat a second helping at dinner, but that's just keepin it real.
I told my trainer that I would post my "short term" goal of hitting 199lbs, and that was set in March of 2013. Turns out it was not that short term of a goal, but I am not stopping now. :-) Btw...this goal has to be hit by Thanksgiving. No sweat right???
Thanks for reading!
Let's get to it...
I had training today, and weighed in at the end. 208.5lbs. This is a increase from Friday's weigh in by about 2.5lbs, due to my choice of Panda Express (them crispy honey shrimp are bangin!) on Friday, Jason's Deli (who doesn't eat the FREE corn and spice muffins) Saturday after going to Apple for the 100th time only to find out that the newly released iPhone 6 Plus that they advertise every 6 minutes on national TV is still out of stock at the store that created the stupid thing. Then finally, Sunday's traditional dinner at Moe's following the worship service that we lead on Sunday evenings at 6:30pm, which everyone should go to... SHOUT! at First Lutheran Church Here is a sample of what you can hear when you come!
Anyway, today was much better from the food standpoint. I did eat a second helping at dinner, but that's just keepin it real.
I told my trainer that I would post my "short term" goal of hitting 199lbs, and that was set in March of 2013. Turns out it was not that short term of a goal, but I am not stopping now. :-) Btw...this goal has to be hit by Thanksgiving. No sweat right???
Thanks for reading!
Sunday, October 26, 2014
Hello world! This blog is being written to clear my head about things like weight loss, life, and basically a quest to figure things out. To avoid all the jib-jab that I could include in this first blog entry, I am going to jump right in with reality as it stands right now.
Actually that is a bit of a lie because I need to start back in March of this year to put things into perspective. On March 18th, my Pop lost his life due to a blood clot following spine reconstructive surgery. On March 21st, I was out on a run taking a break from the chaos. Along that run, I told myself that that day would be the first day of the rest of my life. I was more than cloudy with the crap going on in my head, and the following day would be the memorial service for my dad. Beyond ridic how crazy that still sounds to me even in this moment. I was mad, heartbroken, and confused, but somewhere in the craziness of that week I was able to find the clarity to realize that as cliché as it sounds I was going to change my life forever.
My biggest demon without a doubt is my lack of ability to commit to losing the weight that I have so carefully taken the last let's say 15 years of life to put on. As of today, I have had the pleasure of working with a personal trainer twice a week for about 18 months. During that time, I have had some success in moving from my highest weight of 240 lbs down to about 202 lbs.
However, during that time I have gone back and forth between these weights, and never been able to break into the under 200 lb club. Jaclyn and I watch Biggest Loser for inspiration, and see how the contestants come to the ranch with their "life baggage." Along their journey, most of them have their "Biggest Loser" moment. I truly don't think that I need this to happen in order for me to have that breakthrough moment of clarity. I just need to commit! I need to commit not only to the process, but also to myself. I can be the guy who tries to find the person or thing that must be responsible, but the reality is that it is none of that. It is me!
The death of my dad has shaken me to the core, and brought death right to my doorstep. I received that call from my brother that nobody wants, and that everyone dreads. This is enough to make you change, but you have to be willing to commit. I have talked to my dads spirit about this since that day in March, and I even committed then to doing this for him, but ultimately I have failed that commitment as of this day. Enough is enough...
So blogger world, this is it. Through this public outpouring, I shall commit to both myself and to the world that I shall not turn back until I reach my weight loss goal, which right now stands at 180 lbs. My current weight is 205 lbs. I will return soon with my next entry. It may not be about weight loss, but we shall see where this takes me.
And btw...please feel free to call me out if at anytime you see that I am breaking this code of mine, minus a beer or two each week. I want to lose weight, but I am not cra cra! :-)
Actually that is a bit of a lie because I need to start back in March of this year to put things into perspective. On March 18th, my Pop lost his life due to a blood clot following spine reconstructive surgery. On March 21st, I was out on a run taking a break from the chaos. Along that run, I told myself that that day would be the first day of the rest of my life. I was more than cloudy with the crap going on in my head, and the following day would be the memorial service for my dad. Beyond ridic how crazy that still sounds to me even in this moment. I was mad, heartbroken, and confused, but somewhere in the craziness of that week I was able to find the clarity to realize that as cliché as it sounds I was going to change my life forever.
My biggest demon without a doubt is my lack of ability to commit to losing the weight that I have so carefully taken the last let's say 15 years of life to put on. As of today, I have had the pleasure of working with a personal trainer twice a week for about 18 months. During that time, I have had some success in moving from my highest weight of 240 lbs down to about 202 lbs.
However, during that time I have gone back and forth between these weights, and never been able to break into the under 200 lb club. Jaclyn and I watch Biggest Loser for inspiration, and see how the contestants come to the ranch with their "life baggage." Along their journey, most of them have their "Biggest Loser" moment. I truly don't think that I need this to happen in order for me to have that breakthrough moment of clarity. I just need to commit! I need to commit not only to the process, but also to myself. I can be the guy who tries to find the person or thing that must be responsible, but the reality is that it is none of that. It is me!
The death of my dad has shaken me to the core, and brought death right to my doorstep. I received that call from my brother that nobody wants, and that everyone dreads. This is enough to make you change, but you have to be willing to commit. I have talked to my dads spirit about this since that day in March, and I even committed then to doing this for him, but ultimately I have failed that commitment as of this day. Enough is enough...
So blogger world, this is it. Through this public outpouring, I shall commit to both myself and to the world that I shall not turn back until I reach my weight loss goal, which right now stands at 180 lbs. My current weight is 205 lbs. I will return soon with my next entry. It may not be about weight loss, but we shall see where this takes me.
And btw...please feel free to call me out if at anytime you see that I am breaking this code of mine, minus a beer or two each week. I want to lose weight, but I am not cra cra! :-)
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)